One of my favorite things about Undeadly was the awesome zombisms!!! Here’s a peek into that awesomeness!!
The Care and Feeding of Zombies
This Information is Courtesy of Big Al’s Zomporium
So, you’re a first-time zombie owner. Congratulations! At Big Al’s Zomporium, we know our valued customers have many questions about the care and feeding of zombies. That’s why we’ve put together this FAQ. We recommend you keep it in a convenient location for quick reference. If you have any problems with your zombie, please call our friendly representatives during business hours. If you are having a zombie emergency, call 933 (ZEE) to reach emergency zombie services.
Where do I keep my zombie?
Zombies require year-round shelter, which must be temperature-controlled, include a resting place, and have easy access to an emergency exit. The Zombie & Walking Dead Protection Act is a federal law that requires all zombie owners to follow these basic guidelines for providing shelter. Sticking your zombie in the garden shed, tethering it to a tree, or locking it in a closet is not considered sufficient shelter. Zombie owners can and will be fined or charged with zombie abuse if authorities discover you do not have appropriate shelter.
How do I give my zombie instructions?
Zombies have the limited ability to follow basic, one-step commands. They do not have the brain functions to complete complicated tasks (such as doing your taxes—whether or not your zombie used to be a CPA or an IRS agent) nor can they follow a long to-do list. You give your zombie one simple job, and when that’s completed, you give him another. Your zombie can bring in the groceries, take out the trash, mow the lawn, start your car on a cold morning, watch a scary movie with you, change light bulbs, and much more! Your zombie gives you 24/7 household help.
Where can I find out more information about zombies?
There are plenty of resources for learning more about the care and feeding of your zombie. There are some good tips at this website: http://www.michelevail.com/#!__zombies-and-ghosts And remember, you can rely on Big Al’s Zomporium, conveniently located in Las Vegas, for all your zombie-making needs!
Undeadly (The Reaper Diaries #1) by Michelle Vail
Book I in the The Reaper series
Publication Date: November 27th 2012 by HarlequinTEEN
The day I turned 16, my boyfriend-to-be died.I brought him back to life.Then things got a little weird…Molly Bartolucci wants to blend in, date hottie Rick and keep her zombie-raising abilities on the down-low. Then the god Anubis chooses her to become a reaper—and she accidentally undoes the work of another reaper, Rath. Within days, she’s shipped off to the Nekyia Academy, an elite boarding school that trains the best necromancers in the world. And her personal reaping tutor? Rath.Life at Nekyia has its plusses. Molly has her own personal ghoul, for one. Rick follows her there out of the blue, for another…except, there’s something a little off about him. When students at the academy start to die and Rath disappears, Molly starts to wonder if anything is as it seems. Only one thing is certain—-Molly’s got an undeadly knack for finding trouble….THE REAPER DIARIES